CVRRYFLVRDCVNT

TRIGGER WARNING: explicit nudity, depraved fantasies, abhorrent language, & body unpositivity.

the secret diary of an ugly, gooning, tranny, faggot/dyke curry-nigger.

SAME OL' MISTAKES

my thoughts before taking these pictures: "oh, i should mention on my new secret horny diary that thanks these new clitoral orgasms, i can actually orgasm to vanilla porn again! sometimes even just the visuals! i don't NEED to hear dirty talk describing absolutely heinous sexual crimes against humanity to be able to orgasm!"

my thoughts after this round, and then the second round that came after it, where i was literally TORTURING my clit with the harsh head of the magic wand while watching typically vile pornographic art: "oh right, i'm a freak, i'll always be a freak."

THE BEGINNING

first nudes in the new apartment. starting from scratch the way i thought i'd be back in september when i arrived in montréal. which is to say... i'm an almost-43 year old with no furniture. probably not ideal. but no one was gonna fuck me anytime soon anyway, lol.

it's just me and the wand. speaking of... another round, chéri?

THE END

last nudes in the old apartment. moving tomorrow. excuse the mess. that isn't how i live.

and with changes all a-brewing... i had my final haircut and body grooming session in my fancy bathroom with these incredible mirrors on all sides, i will NOT have that luxury in my new place... and i decided to lose the beard. i may have to present "male" because such is my tragic lot in life (so far), but i could at least start presenting a little more fucking QUEER if i want to find a beautiful asian faggot to rape my virgin ass with his cock and/or strap one of these days.

as the first post in this secret diary predicted... the magic wand and new clitoral orgasms have indeed taken over my life, i goon with my vibrator like the best gooner girls throughout history, and i am loving every fucking second of it. the thought of stroking a cock like a boy now makes me SICK.

i GRIND the hitachi DEEP against my clit. i almost fucking torture my clit with it. the small desi clit is almost always smooshed against my FUPA and my fat brown sand-nigger belly these days, smooshed HARD, but it's also throbbing and far more erect than it ever was when i was masturbating like a boy just one month ago.

i always cum against my own belly. it pulses out with the vibrations, not shooting very far... but the orgasm is so much longer... and more intense... and the cum, again, far more plentiful than just a month ago when i came like a boy.

i am home.

(well, not literally. because i'm moving. but y'know. emotionally. physically. in a horny way.)

FIGHT THE FUTURE

it's been a lot of years of trauma and bad habits, but i think i'm finally consistently fucking losing weight. here's to being a faggy little twink again soon.

(and then maybe... transition starts?)

GENDER EUPHORIA!

the most incredible thing just happened...

i hadn't masturbated in a couple of days (RARE, obviously), and i also hadn't used my hitachi magic wand in a while (LAZY, i guess), so i figured... let's make a night of it! now, i've had the hitachi for a couple of years (thanks to my LA roommate valerie, long funny story), but perhaps due to lack of imagination... i've always just used the strength settings, and used it mostly under my saggy cunt lips... never the pulse/pattern settings, and rarely on the clit.

well, as i toggled through my archive of custom videos from sky today, i used the first pulse setting... and as i ran the magic wand against my nasty nigger clit, i noticed it felt more sensitive than ever... and i realized... holy fucking shit, i think this is going to make me cum...

and sure enough... IT HAPPENED. my first hands-free orgasm. GENDER FUCKING EUPHORIA.

so that's that. that's a wrap on my cock ever being used as a cock again. i officially have a clit now, i'm offically a gooning girl forever riding her vibrator, and i'm officially going to be chasing this feeling for the rest of my fucking life.